fear or Fear?

I am sitting here at my computer, with my jaw needing to be dug out of the floor.  My spread sheet is reading 25.1%... I'm honestly not even sure how this is happening! Okay, I mean I do. It's God. That's it.  But, did I think I'd make it to the June 1st 25% deadline, let alone a day early?? HECK NO.

I mean I trust, but I trust with fear not Fear....Let me explain..

I tend to seek the Lord and go okay, I'll walk through this door you're calling me through..I think.... But, the whole time, I'm fully expecting it to be slammed in my face... I walk through the door, but I'm like a five year old in the dark, tip toeing, ready to flee at the sight of anything scary...I walk through the door, ready to take control and run away from the Lord at any moment.

And..when the door doesn't slam.. I stand in awe. But, shouldn't I have known He would come through? I prayed, I sought, He answered.  I shouldn't be surprised, but I am. I am surprised he's faithful to His word.  I'm surprised that He's called me, and I have obeyed! I'm surprised at this absolutely mind-blowing opportunity is coming closer and closer into reach. I'm surprised this abundant life is mine....... But, I shouldn't be.

Matthew 17:20- Jesus is talking to his disciples who were wondering why they couldn't heal a boy: He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”

 I need to start trusting with boldness. I say I'm throwing caution to the wind, but I still doubted, and I still feared.  But through this process, my fear is changing. I once was nearly crippled, but now, Oh but now, I stand strong and in reverence. I stand in Fear of the Lord's mighty plan.....and I trust He will bring it through completion. 

Are you fearful or full of Fear? 

Standing in AWE.

Heather